this one time in primary school we were doing a play and the teacher asked who wanted to be a flower and i put my hand up as a joke but then i actually got the role ‘flower’, i feel like this is what happened when robert pattinson got his role in twilight
(via safe-behind-bars)
i need a job where i work one hour a week and i get paid a thousand dollars a minute
(via safe-behind-bars)
i’m always weirdly proud when my pee is clear because it’s like fuck yeah i’m so hydrated
(via klath)
elphabaforpresidentofgallifrey:
my eldest sister had a boyfriend when she was in fifth grade, but we moved away so they obviously couldn’t see each other. well, when she was in college her friend introduced her to some guy and it was her old boyfriend from fifth grade. after two days of catching up she told him she wanted to marry him. they’ve been married for ten years and have two kids together.
WHAT
dude sell that shit to disney
(via one-day-to-a-new-beginning)
everyone is like “omg tumblr should delete blogs that have been inactive for 2+ years” but i dont think they should
just imagine in 10 years time, in the back of your mind you remember tumblr, you open it up and you’re still logged in and you get to look at your blog and remember all this.
now imagine if you went back to see your old blog of your teenage years and it had been deleted because somebody ‘wanted your url’
how sad would that be
(via no-bowties-are-cool)
if i ever met a genie i wouldnt wish for a million dollars id wish that whenever i bought something i’d always have the right amount of money to pay for it in my pocket
you are one of the great thinkers of our time
(via agirlinabrandnewdress)
Woops my 10 minute study break turned into a whole year
(via one-day-to-a-new-beginning)
